Bowling is a lot like life. We aim, we roll, and we try to hit all the pins down. Sometimes, we are very lucky… Strike! But, sometimes, our ball just rolls into the gutter.
Yesterday, we all caravanned to the nearest bowling alley to celebrate the birthday of my youngest brother. I laughed to myself at the different reactions to each bowl. Hands flew in the air. My own son threw himself down to the floor and covered his eyes. People twirled… bent over… cringed… looked away… sighed… or clasped their cheeks and gasped that the pins actually all went down at the same time!
My son started out disenchanted. He wasn’t doing very well. He dropped the ball and it crept down the lane like an old lady with a walker crossing the street. We all held our breath and willed it the end… hoping it would not come to a complete standstill.
Crocodile teardrops fell. “I’m not good enough!” he wailed, clapped his hand on his forehead and plopped himself in the nearest chair. It was time for a pep talk. I felt like the boxer’s coach who towels off the player in the corner of the ring. “Listen, Tyler. You’re only 5 points behind mommy. Mommy is 29 and you’re six, so you’re doing pretty good. Bowling is just a game. It’s supposed to be fun. Not many people are really good at it.” He blinks at me and considers my advice… warily.
In the middle of our third round, Tyler is cheering everyone from the sidelines. His attitude has completely changed. “Good job mommy! Good job out there!” he declared. I had just knocked down a measly 4 pins, but Tyler was proudly singing my praises. He was having a blast cheering everyone on.
He, in bowling, was similar to what a lot of us are like, in life. Both depend on the perspective we take to determine whether or not we are having fun. One has to realize that not many people are experts. On one turn, we could get it all right… just like in life… strike – 10 points. But, on other turns… we could completely miss…gutter ball.
I think the most interested thing about bowling is not in the game itself. The game itself is rather boring. Watch the pins fall down. Calculate the pins… the one with the most pins down wins. Okay, we get the point.
The most interesting thing about this game is watching the reactions of others. A complete novice could throw the ball down the lane just right and get a perfect score – strike. He jumps up and down like he just won the lottery.
It’s a fun game to experience with others. Just like life is fun to experience with others. You don’t go bowling alone. You invite the people who are important to you.
Like life, this game is not as much about who wins or loses… but about the journey to get there. It’s about sharing each others’ reactions… cheering the ones who did well… encouraging the ones who missed the mark.
When my son realized that he wasn’t going to win every round, he started to have fun and be part of the team. It’s not a one-man show. Just like life is not a one-man show. You cheer and clap for others and hope for the near impossible feat of getting all 10 pins down.
Life has a lot of pins. Getting them all down at the same time is a rare occurrence. But, it’s the long term total that is most important. How many obstacles can we overcome in our lifetime? And do we have a crowd to cheer us on?
Sometimes our best intention gets them all down. Sometimes, it falls in the gutter. But, our focus needs to be on keeping those best intentions rolling down the lane. We need to cheer each other on and encourage them in their best intentions. Being frustrated and beaten is no way to live life. Life is in the little moments of enjoyment when the intention hits the mark. Enjoying these little moments with the people you love makes it that much better.
I like your reference to bowling and life...makes sense. Even the best bowlers have off days and it's such a game of inconsistency. I still enjoy those times when I do bowl and it is always with friends or family. We just have to have fun with life and not be so serious...life isn't permanent.
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