Life's Training Wheels

I’m reading a book called The Last Lecture.  It’s a professor’s last words of advice to his children, students and readers.  This successful and popular computer science professor died of pancreatic cancer shortly after he wrote this book.  His goal was to share what he has learned about the keys to an enriching life. 

In his book, he states that “being earnest is better than being hip.”  Those that are earnest in life will go far in their dreams. 

However, as we all start our work week and gear up for the day to day busyness in life, I have to wonder how earnest we are.  Is this what happens when we get older?  We lose our earnestness?

Another word for “earnest” is passion.  Being passionate about something is more important that fitting in. But, too many times, we try to fit ourselves in the mold than break the mold.  And we wonder where all the earnestness we used to have escaped to?  Being earnest knows no mold.

My son lives every moment of every day in deep earnest.  Whether it’s playing hockey and scoring twelve goals (yes, 12!) or picking out the best doughnuts at the bakery, he does everything in deep earnest.

Today, he found me in the backyard and declared confidently, “Mom, I think it’s time for my training wheels to come off.”  Not much comes out in question form with this kid.  “Mom, I need something to drink.  Mom, you forgot my lunch money.  Mom, you left the car door open.”  Thanks bud.

I asked the obvious question anyway, “How do you know you are ready to go without training wheels?”  No hesitation.  “I just know Mom.”  “Have you ridden a bike before without training wheels?” I persisted.  “No mom. But, I won’t know until they are off.”  Good point. 

He trots off to find the toolbox and before I know it, I’m ratcheting off lug nuts on my hands and knees.  “Good job Mom!” my son pats me on the back.    

My son has never had a lack of confidence or bravado.  In fact, it oozes out of him.  Off he went thinking that he was going to go flying down the street with no hands doing wheelies.  But, instead he swerves and falls down.  Thank goodness for helmets.  But, he gets up again in earnest, juts his chin out, and tries again.   

I had to laugh.  Come hell or high water, he was going to conquer that bike.  Another line in the book - “Brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough.”  While we may walk along the brick wall and wonder why it’s there, my son will take one look at it, set his mind to it, and start climbing. 

This is why we start losing the earnestness in life.  We let the brick walls stop us and misdirect us.  We walk along them instead of finding a way to break through them.  We let them become fixtures in our lives, obstructions we have to accept, rather than tearing them down. 

My son was no longer going to stand having training wheels on.  Even at six years old, he knew this was a brick wall that he was going to remove.  These decisions fuel his earnestness in life.  He fails and succeeds, but doesn’t pay attention to the failure.  In fact, the failure teaches him more than the successes. 

Another line in the book.  “Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.  And experience is often the most valuable thing you have to offer.”  While we may try and fall down without training wheels, what we do with what we have learned is the most important thing.  This becomes our legacy and our own “last lecture.”  But, we have to do it in earnest or no one will want to listen.